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Marie McIntyre, Ph.D.

Q: “I recently became friends with one of my employees, and we started doing things together outside the office. Before long, ‘John’ began to slack off and pay less attention to his work. When I wrote him up for poor performance, he became very rude. Now John completely ignores my authority and even shares confidential information about me with others. I feel as though I have to walk on egg shells around him. How can I fix this?” Discouraged Supervisor

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Q: “Do you think it would be okay to send a complimentary email about my boss to her manager? Or would that just look as though I’m ‘sucking up’?” Grateful

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Q: “After working as an administrative assistant in human resources for fifteen years, I recently transferred into the finance department. The two co-workers assigned to do my training have completely ignored me. The vice president’s executive assistant makes negative remarks about everyone and has an inflated sense of her own importance. These women seem to enjoy making others feel bad, and I believe they are threatened by my knowledge and experience. How should I handle this?” Unwelcome Employee

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Q: “After working as an administrative assistant in human resources for fifteen years, I recently transferred into the finance department. The two co-workers assigned to do my training have completely ignored me. The vice president’s executive assistant makes negative remarks about everyone and has an inflated sense of her own importance. These women seem to enjoy making others feel bad, and I believe they are threatened by my knowledge and experience. How should I handle this?” Unwelcome Employee

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Q: “My manager and I are concerned about one of my long-term employees who has a very negative attitude. ‘Jerry’ has been here for more than twenty years, but has not been promoted because of his job performance. He sometimes lets his resentment about this come to the surface. We recently got a new department head, and Jerry is having trouble adjusting to the change in management style. He doesn’t seem to understand that his poor attitude is going to cause him problems with the new boss. What can we do to help him?” Worried Supervisor

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Q: “I work with a woman who seems unwilling to learn anything on her own. About twelve months ago, ‘Tanya’ transferred back into our department after being gone for five years. Although we are now using completely different software, she refuses to take classes or consult the manual. Tanya constantly asks me to help her and often wants to copy my work. She shows no interest in the online training that I have suggested. Her endless requests are driving me crazy. What should I do?” Not a Teacher

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Q: “After two days at my new job, I have not yet signed a payroll form or been told about my work hours. This is a small family business which has been quite successful, but seems very disorganized. I have made two appointments with the owners to discuss my schedule, but they forgot both times. Is this a bad sign?” Worried Newcomer

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Q: “Last week, one of my co-workers handed me my annual performance appraisal and said my boss wanted me to sign it. When I saw that he had given me a below-average rating, I felt really hurt. I told my co-worker that I would not sign the form because I did not understand the reasons for my rating. Apparently, my manager doesn’t think I’m important enough to spend five minutes explaining it to me. Do I have a right to be angry about this?” Offended

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Q: “The woman whose desk is next to mine is pals with our network administrator, who supposedly likes to read every email that comes into the company. I recently figured out that these two have been reading my personal email whenever I access my account at work. Even more alarming, they apparently tried to log in to my online banking. What can I do about this?” Harassed

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Q: “I seem to be experiencing an increase in responsibility without any change in title or pay. I work for a large healthcare company which is headquartered in another state. In addition to myself, our office includes a part-time assistant and a newly-hired employee. Although the new employee and I have the same title, our boss has made me the lead person in the office. He expects me to coordinate communications and ensure that everything runs smoothly. We will soon be hiring another person, making me responsible for three employees. This would seem to warrant a promotion, but I’m not sure how to broach the subject.” Hesitant 

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Q: “My co-worker, ‘Angie,’ sent me a seething email saying that I talk about teamwork, but don’t act like a team player. This was a completely unexpected slam against me. I told our manager, and he spoke to Angie about it, but nothing else was done. Now, whenever I encounter Angie anywhere in the building, she immediately turns around and walks the other way. My boss says, ‘That’s just the way she is,’ but Angie doesn’t seem to act like this with anyone else. She doesn’t have to like me, but we do have to work together, so I can’t take much more of this.” Ignored

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Q: “My written termination notice misrepresents the reason that I no longer work for my former employer. It states that I failed to comply with the required start time of 8:00 AM. This is not the whole story, so I want to provide the actual facts in my upcoming job interviews. I don’t want to sell myself short by adhering to the company’s fiction that I was fired for tardiness, but I also don’t want to malign my former manager. How should I explain this situation?” Wronged

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Q: “After working for five years as an executive assistant to my boss, I recently heard that he has been saying negative things about me to the managers who report to him. This puts me in a very awkward position, so I would like some advice about how to handle the situation.” Hurt & Offended

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Q: “I supervise two dispatchers at our local 911 emergency center. Unfortunately, one of them won’t listen to anything I tell her. ‘Donna’ sometimes gives out incorrect directions, so I try to interrupt the call and correct her. She just ignores me and continues transmitting, which slows down the officers’ response.

“I have explained to Donna that I am only trying to ensure that we send help to the right address as quickly as possible. Although she says she understands, she continues to disregard my instructions.

“Donna doesn’t seem to care about her mistakes, so I don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to my manager, but he hasn’t been any help.” Worried Supervisor

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Q: “After working with my manager, ‘Julia,’ for eight years, I recently received my first negative performance appraisal. Julia plans to retire soon because she feels she has no future here. Our company was acquired two years ago, and the new management has a very different style. When I get a new boss, I’m afraid this appraisal will make a bad impression. What should I do?” Worried

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Q: “I recently applied for the supervisory position in my department, but management selected an applicant from outside the company. Although my boss said I was not qualified for the position, he has now asked me to train the woman who was hired. If he thinks I’m not qualified, how can he expect me to train someone else?”  Rejected

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Q: “Our office has an outdated cellphone policy that doesn’t address text messaging. Most of our employees keep cellphones on their desk and do a lot of texting during the work day. Many people feel that management needs to step up and deal with this issue, because texting distracts people and reduces productivity. Don’t you think we should have a texting policy?” Annoyed

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Q: “One of my employees constantly criticizes her colleagues for making ‘immoral’ life choices. Her judgmental remarks are creating a very uncomfortable atmosphere on our team. As a business owner, I feel I have a responsibility to keep people from being harassed this way. What should I do?” Troubled Manager

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Q: “I have a co-worker who is running a Web-based business on company time. ‘Linn’ spends hours monitoring her website, taking orders, sending invoices and arranging for shipments. At the end of the day, she prints out her documents and takes them home. Our boss appears to be completely unaware of these activities. He occasionally asks other employees to help Linn out because she’s so busy. However, she’s just busy making money for herself. Is there anything I can do?” Outraged

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Q: “A colleague and I recently started a business venture as equal partners. Whenever he wants something, ‘Dave’ insists on getting his own way and refuses to discuss other options. If I disagree with him, he becomes very moody. Now he would like to bring one of his radio buddies into the business, which I think would be a huge mistake. I have suggested alternate ways that we might work with this guy, but Dave won’t even consider other possibilities. These arguments are wearing me out, so I’m tempted to just disengage and start my own company. Is there any way to make this partnership work?” Ready to Quit

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