Slay the monster called envy

EnvyThere’s nothing wrong with feeling a little bit of envy or jealousy, but you don’t want to let it get the best of you at work. Instead, work on strategies to cope with the feelings, so they don’t come out at an inappropriate time and leave you looking unprofessional in front of your boss and co-workers.

Learn from the target of your jealousy. If someone else got the promotion you were hoping for, don’t focus on his shortcomings and stew over how you are more deserving. Instead, concentrate on what he did to help him land the promotion and take some lessons to help you moving forward.

Avoid emotional triggers. If there’s a co-worker who just drives you insane with envy, try avoiding her if possible. You can limit in-person communication by relying on email and avoiding the break room when she’s refilling her coffee mug.

Tell yourself the truth. Pretending you don’t feel jealous or envious won’t make it so. Instead face your feelings and try to get to the root of them. That’s the first step in managing them instead of letting them take over your life.

Focus on your wins. You may not have gotten the promotion you wanted and you may never receive the same praise as the office’s most-organized employee, but there’s plenty you can do well. Set a fitness goal to work toward, organize an industry event or start a blog. Doing so will fill up your time and give you something you’re good at to be proud of.

Tough Talks D

— Adapted from “Dealing with Envy and Jealousy at Work,” Anita Bruzzese, Intuit’s QuickBase blog.