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Dale Carnegie on winning friends

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in Leaders & Managers,Leadership Skills

The 20th century guru of self-help, Dale Carnegie, followed his own recipe for success, becoming a crisp speaker, confronting fear and learning what people want.

Here’s how he put it:

“There is one all-important law of human conduct. If we obey that law, we shall almost never get into trouble. In fact, that law, if obeyed, will bring us countless friends and constant happiness. … That law is this: Always make the other person feel important.”

“The rest of us are just like you: We are interested in what we want. So the only way on earth to influence the other fellow is to talk about what he wants and show him how to get it.”

Critics accused Carnegie of advocating the craven manipulation of others. But those who met him found, instead of a salesman with gleaming teeth and a bone-crushing handshake, a self-effacing man of charm, enthusiasm and warmth.

— Adapted from Self-Help Messiah: Dale Carnegie and Success in Modern America, Steven Watts, Other Press.

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