Your Office Coach

Each Wednesday, nationally syndicated workplace columnist Marie G. McIntyre, Ph. D., answers your “in the trenches” workplace questions on everything from team-building to getting a raise to dealing with difficult people.

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Question: Several years ago, I filed a discrimination charge against my boss.  After the issue was resolved by the EEOC, she and I were able to repair our relationship.  However, she recently retired, and now I have a new manager. From day one, my new boss has treated me like a troublemaker, so I assume he was told about my discrimination complaint. Because I felt he was targeting me, I complained to the EEOC again. However, this time they didn’t do anything. The mistreatment continues, and so does my battle.  What can I do to have peace in this job?  Sick of the Fight
Question:  I keep getting calls from my former employer about how to do my old job.  For 24 years, I was the “go-to girl” who held that company together. When the business was sold several months ago, I was let go along with many others.  

Now I feel that I am being used.  If they can’t figure out how to do my work, then they never should have fired me.  However, I may need a recommendation from this employer during my job search, so I’m not sure how to handle this.  Should I continue to answer their questions?
Question:  My boss thinks that he’s a manager, but he really doesn’t manage at all. Even though he owns the business, he’s gone most of the time.  He avoids problems, hates confrontation and makes decisions based on his mood that particular day.
Question: “A friend has had several interviews for counseling positions.  Although she feels that they have gone well, she is never asked back for a second round. She is well-qualified, has a Master’s degree, and presents herself very professionally.  I’m afraid the problem may be her age (57) or the fact that she and her husband filed for bankruptcy last year. What do you think?"  —Wanting to Help
Question:  “I can’t stand my new co-worker, even though she seemed nice at first.  After only a few months, this woman is already trying to take over.  She constantly sucks up to our boss, so now he listens to her instead of me.  Whenever I talk about my personal life, she becomes very critical and starts telling me what to do...
Question: “One of my co-workers seldom talks to me anymore.  She used to joke and laugh all the time.  When I ask, ‘What’s the matter?’ she says, ‘Nothing.’  What do I do? — Frozen Out
Question: "My wife seems to be trapped by her fear of looking for work. She used to do freelance projects, but she has never had to find a permanent position 'from scratch.' Her idea of conducting a job search is to stay home and complete online applications. Because of my job, we recently moved to a new city where she doesn’t know anyone.  If I suggest making phone calls or visiting potential employers, she breaks down..."
Question: “Last year, when family matters required my attention, I left my full-time job as a graphic designer.  I have now decided to semi-retire and would like a part-time position with flexible hours. I am 53 years old and don’t need a lot of income. I would like some advice on how to state my preferences to potential employers.”  —Ready to Cut Back
Question:  “Since taking this job four months ago, I have been bothered by a co-worker’s relationship with my manager. This woman does everything for him. She even writes his emails and drives him on personal errands. In return, he occasionally covers up for her and handles some of her responsibilities when she has a deadline to meet. He also shares a lot of information with her...
Question: “In our four-person office, one employee is habitually late every morning. The rest of us work a full eight hours, so we are tired of her tardiness. Otherwise, we all get along fine. Our boss doesn't see us arrive, so he has no clue that she is always late. We believe she is taking advantage of this situation.  What should we do?”  —Punctual Co-workers
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