Question: What do you do when department heads do not communicate major changes in the department to the administrative assistant? It's frustrating to not ever know what people are thinking and talking about behind closed doors until the very last minute.  -- Carolyn

Question: Any suggestions on how to perk up a boss who is being pulled into the pits of despair by a negative-thinking company president?

My boss has always been easy-going, but I can see the stress building up.

The company business is doing well. I don't know how to turn my boss away from the "dark side."  -- Anonymous

Question: We have several partners in our law firm who constantly ask administrative staff to do personal things, like shop online, wrap gifts, make personal travel arrangements, print personal photos, etc. As the administrative manager, I find this offensive.

Partners feel that admins should do whatever they're asked, since the partners have to stay 'billable.' I think it's disrespectful and promotes a 'master/slave' mentality.

Your opinions are appreciated.  -- Office Manager, West Palm Beach

Question: I am an administrative assistant for the president of my company and I feel I'm not being utilized enough. Does anyone have any suggestions or suggestions on books to help me get my boss to utilize me more? Thank you.  -- Anonymous

Editor's note: The National Institute of Business Management publishes two books that might help you:

1. Results, Recognition and Rewards.
2. Supercharge Your Career.

Find ordering information about both -- as well as about Personal Report for the Administrative Professional -- at www.nibm.net.

Also, you might check out How to Get From Cubicle to Corner Office, by Joel Weiss, and Become an Inner Circle Assistant, by Joan Burge.

Question: My boss, I believe, has a problem with ADHD. Sometimes, he bounces off the walls and is very difficult to keep up with. I try to keep up with him, but lately, I am exhausted by mid-afternoon. I am at the point that I am so frustrated because I am running in circles most of the time.

My boss will tell me he needs to schedule a meeting or various meetings throughout the day. Then, two minutes after we have met regarding his files/meeting requests, etc., he asks me if I have set up the meeting regarding a topic that he never asked me to schedule. So, I continually have to check and re-check my notes for who the invitees are for meeting A or B; then, I have to ask him if his question relates to scheduling meeting A or B. His normal reply: "Oh, no. This is another meeting I am talking about."

Many times, he forgets to give me all of the details.

Are you aware of any books that would help administrative assistants who work with bosses with ADHD? I would like to know how to set up boundaries with my boss, who cannot seem to focus.

I have set up color-coded files; I print meetings from his calendar and attach to the top of a folder for each and every meeting; I arrange files on his credenza; I keep a large, orange "Please sign" file for signatures; and we meet daily to plan meetings, plan projects and to follow up regarding unfinished projects.

I need some help as to how I can become a more efficient assistant to my boss. Any suggestions?  -- Frustrated in Michigan

Question: I have been an admin. for about 2 years -- it is my first job out of college -- and I recently had my annual review.  Everything went fine, but one point that I was told I need to work on was bringing information/gossip to my superiors.

I work for a small company and it is typical for me to hear things that are going on. I always felt that unless someone specifically asked me to talk to a superior for them, I should let them address the issues themselves and follow the appropriate chain of command. Apparently, my bosses feel differently. I was told to decide whether the gossip that I hear could be “detrimental or damaging to the company” and then let them know what I had heard and they would never say who they heard it from.

The problem is that I do work in a small company and it wouldn’t take long for people to figure out where the information was coming from. Also, I understand that if there were to be a strike or something catastrophic of that nature, of course I would bring it to their attention. My problem is the “gray” (or “lighter”) matters: hearing people blowing off steam, employees talking to old bosses (who are also competitors), etc.

What are the guidelines for reporting gossip to my bosses?  -- Trying to be Anonymous!

Question: "Last week, one of our newer employees  -- let's call him 'Nat' -- asked me to show him how to compile a monthly report that I've been doing as part of my job for years. Nobody had mentioned this to me before 'Nat' approached me.

"I showed him how to compile the report. He thanked me and went back to his desk. But now, I'm worried that I'm going to start losing responsibilities.

"I don't know how to bring it up to my boss.

"How would you approach this situation?"  -- Rhoda, Virginia

Question: Our manager consistently underestimates the length of time it will take to complete work. This affects my colleagues and me on a number of levels: 1. The manager is regularly late for meetings, and meetings with the manager generally go much longer. 2. The manager rarely answers questions or completes her own work on time. 3. The manager promises too much to clients and insists that the rest of us in the office stop what we are doing so we can try and meet unrealistic deadlines at the last minute. 4. The manager routinely questions others’ time estimates for both minor tasks and major projects. This has, on occasion, resulted in disputes. Is there any way for an office or an individual to assist someone to become more realistic? One thing I have done in regard to # 4 is outline all the projects, tasks and meetings I have on the docket when I am setting a deadline, so the manager knows what is happening, and we agree on the deadline. This has been somewhat successful, but I find it frustrating. It is also embarrassing, especially in meetings. I also find it difficult to quickly list all my priorities. Thank you for any suggestions you can give me!  -- Discouraged in Vancouver, B.C.

Question: I have a new boss who does not "own it" when she makes a mistake. We often have to communicate with notes, since she is out of her office in meetings most of almost every day.  This is a very busy office with lots of deadlines to meet, so time management is essential.

Recently, she left me a note requiring an answer. I responded by note and returned it to her in-box. A few days later, we were talking about the note contents and I mentioned to her that I had responded and put the note in her office.  She said she "never" got it.
I told her I put it in her in-box, but she once again said she never got it.

When I again gave her the info she was seeking, I looked in her in-box and there was my note to her. She had not even bothered to go through her box.

This happens a lot and it makes me very frustrated with her. When I brought the note to her attention, she just talked over me and said the matter was a "done deal."

Any ideas how I can forgive and forget and not get so frustrated?  -- Anonymous, Wyoming

Question: My boss often acts in a way and makes comments that hurt my feelings and those of others in my office.  For example, today she said that I made too much money. I asked her "Don't I deserve it?"  She didn't answer.  That really bothered me and once again hurt my feelings.

Because all these situations are building up and are really starting to bother me, I decided to let her know how I felt.  In a very professional way, I expressed to her that her comment really hurt me and told her why.  To make a long story short, she was very defensive about it all and I'm sure she will go to the higher boss with the matter.  I truly don't think anything is going to change.

Any suggestions on how to deal with this matter and others similar?  -- Anonymous

Question: I work for a company of about 1,700 employees, spread out among about 50 different locations around the U.S. and the world.  My boss is a director of the largest finance department of the company, and is constantly needed in various teleconferences.  He depends greatly on his Outlook calendar to keep him informed of what's going on, but it is always inaccurate.  His executive assistant is the person who has access to his e-mails and to his calendar, and whose responsibility it is to keep them updated.  I am an assistant secretary to her, and a project assistant for the 45 other people in our department, from whom the majority of my work comes.

One of my job responsibilities is to regularly check our various Share Point sites, through which the departments of our company work together on different projects.  Meeting schedules are usually posted on these sites when they first put them up, but after that, meeting changes/announcements are made via e-mail (which I never see).  My boss is constantly asking me whether or not I am completing my job duties, because he doesn't believe that the updated meeting information has not been posted to the sites.

It is really the executive secretary's responsibility to keep his calendar up to date, as she has the access to all of his information.  However, when we have talked about this issue, she says that it's not her fault; it's that the people sending out the updates do not always include my boss on the "Send To" list!  Additionally, three different people might send out e-mails about the same meeting, the meeting might be referred to in three different ways, and also, the time zones are not always stated and are never consistent.  (So, she finds it difficult to always be on top of this).

I don’t know how to make sure that my boss's calendar is kept properly.  He seems to be blaming me, even though I have no control over or access to the information.  How do I help him with his schedule, and how do I show him that I AM doing my job well?  -- Anonymous

Question: I'm an executive assistant to the president & CEO who, in his 23 years of business, never really had an assistant before. He's mentioned once or twice that he doesn't know how he ever did it without me.

I think he understands the benefits of having an assistant, but he still does not "keep me in the loop" as I expect he should, mainly concerning his schedule. I sit in a room directly behind the receptionist and next to his office. He'll walk right by me and tell her where he's going to be. I thought maybe it was because she's been here for so long, but he also does that with the temp who is currently filling in for the receptionist.

From the road, he'll call everyone else—rarely me—and tell them what he's doing for the day. I have told him that to successfully perform my job duties, I need him to communicate his schedule to me. I even set us up on a shared MS Outlook calendar to make it easier. He said he would try harder to keep me informed, but it's not working. I'm thinking about calling him every morning to check in. Is there anything else I can do?? Please help!  -- A.S.

Question: I am an Executive Assistant who works for a small non-for profit organization (65 employees). We had a CEO who was recently asked to resign (November). We have six Directors and one was asked to be Interim President & CEO while a search firm conducts a search for a new president.

The Acting President, whom I am supposed to be an assistant to, will not include me in any information. It appears that everything is a secret. I can't help if I don't know what is going on. I spend my days doing research for her department and not any Executive Assistant duties. My concern is: When they hire a permanent President, I will not be able to support and help him because I won't know what has happened in the past six months.

Please give me some advice on how to address this issue.  -- Anonymous

Question: We’ve been told recently that we’re not allowed to eat in our work area, and, so far, everybody is following this new rule. Unfortunately, neither of my bosses follows it, though. They both eat at their desks. Please help me either explain this to everyone else or persuade management to follow the rules the same as we’re expected to do.  -- A.C., Missouri

Question: I work for a government agency as a sole support person for about 25 people. With this many people also comes a wide variety of personalities. A handful of these people tend to take their moods or personal problems out on me when they give me work to do. I have talked to the head of our group about this problem and was told to remain even-keeled and not respond to their rude comments. One such comment:  “I don’t want to hear about it; I just want you to do it.”

That came from a stressed-out employee who was demonstrating angry body language. A personal situation was causing the stress, and the employee even called in sick the following day.

If I can’t talk to the person giving me an assignment about the assignment, what am I to do? Things like this happen a couple times a month. When I mentioned  that I thought these instances constituted verbal abuse, the head of our group told me that it would have to be witnessed, and the witness and I would have to document it. I’m currently looking for another position and, in the meantime, would like some suggestions on how to deal with these unpleasantries.  -- Anonymous, Washington

Question: “I started a new job about six months ago as an executive assistant to the CEO of a wealth-advisory corporation. I really like my boss; he’s energetic and pleasant. However, he has some habits and mannerisms that are driving me crazy. While I feel that I can talk to him about his use of curse words in conversations with me, I don’t know how to broach the subject of his ‘distracting mannerisms’ of picking at various body parts in my presence. What can I do? It’s literally making me shudder while we talk.”  -- Marilyn, St. Louis