Here’s a scenario for you:
Rashid (Raoul or Ray) meets Lori in her office, and both nervously
shake hands. Lori notices what feels like a wimpy, limp clasp. Both
think to themselves, “Yech, what a shake.” A two-second exchange like
that can create unease and discomfort in the relationship from then on.
Whose fault is it?
Your thoughts maintain and build, or attack and destroy, the self-esteem of others. Leaders maintain the self-esteem of people around them.
Rejection is inevitable in life, especially if you’re making an effort
and putting yourself out there. Here are some thoughts I use to make it
less painful when I get it.
You have to pay ransom for your good name.
When you are out of a job and an offer comes in, you tend to overlook some red flags about the offer. Even
in a time of near desperation slow down and honestly ask yourself some
questions that will help minimize the possibility that you’ll be
looking for a job again, in the near future:
Write your autobiography – today. Don’t put it off. Write from day
one up to the present. Every six months or so, take a couple of hours
and update it. Why put your history on paper? It’s your story,
so it’s a good story worth recording. You’re as important as anyone
who has written one. It’s a good source for updating your resume, job
interviews and promotion evaluations — in managing and leading with a
If you find yourself job hunting, be sure to take time to search for
your values as well as your next job. Stressful work over time can
make you forget what’s important to you — what you want in life. All
of a sudden two or twenty-two years go by, and you’re not doing
satisfying work. View your job elimination in a positive
light. Now you can consider what you would truly enjoy doing in your
next job – and for the rest of your life.
We’ve seen CEOs attacked for Wall Street greed, questioned by
Congressional committees, exposed on “60 Minutes,” and led to prison in
handcuffs. How did those businesses’ heads turn into incompetent
and/or dishonest crooks and lowlifes? We assume power corrupted
them. No. Usually, he (or she) was rotten from the start. He was just
under the radar until he got into the visible top job; he didn’t become
incompetent but was always incompetent as a business leader. So what
With the global economy sagging, your company tightening its belt, your
stock worth dwindling and your children thinking you don’t understand
what they are going through, there is a lot of duress and stress in
life. To step up as a leader, manage your attitude – don’t leave it to
others. Take on and stick with a productive and constructive
perspective. Don’t let the press, family, friends or colleagues sway
you with a negative and destructive perspective.