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In difficult HR quandary, where should my loyalties lie?

By John Wilcox, Moderator
10/21/2008 - 1:30am
HR Management

John Wilcox, Moderator

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John Wilcox is senior editor of 15 HR Specialist newsletters covering employment law, compensation and benefits, as well as theHRSpecialist.com. A journalist who has covered HR, training, organization development and business management for more than 15 years, John keeps his finger on the pulse of what’s working in HR through daily contact with some of the nation’s top HR pros, business people and employment law attorneys.

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Question: "I'm the HR Director for our company. A good friend and co-worker has informed me in confidence that she is planning on resigning pending a job offer she says she'll likely receive. I like my job, I like my boss and don't want to keep this information from him. Where should my loyalty lie? With my friend? With the company?" — C in CA

Comments

It's not a matter of loyalty. Your friend told you something in confidence. It is not the type of information that MUST be shared (such as a revelation of harassment that would require an investigation). There is no real harm to the organization in not sharing this information. (I assume she would provide 2 weeks notice like most employees.) I think you should hold this information in confidence.

Posted by: | October 21, 2008 at 01:31 PM

Wheter the person is your friend or not, the information was told to you "in confidence" and therefore needs to stay "in confidence". ANY confidential information told to HR must stay confidential. IMHO.

Posted by: Anon | October 21, 2008 at 01:38 PM

You're in a hard spot. However, I would keep in mind that this co-worker divulged this information to you because you are friends. If you were not friends, she would not have mentioned it. While this is a fine line to walk, I think you should wait. I would not tell my boss until after your friend receives the offer. Think about what would happen if you do mention it, and then nothing happens - this could put your friend in a tough spot. While I understand loyalty to the company, and wanting to keep your boss in the loop, your friend probably wants to keep this quiet until she has a firm offer. As HR you have the hard job of keeping business and personal separate. I judge whether or not to mention things to my boss based on several criteria. Any time something is highly relevant and action needs to be taken, mention it. When it's something mostly gossip based and may be groundless, no action need be taken, etc., I watch the waters so to speak.

Posted by: C in IL | October 21, 2008 at 01:40 PM

I absolutely agree with the first poster. The information about your friends job offer came to you as her FRIEND, not as her HR Director. There comes a point where you need to learn how to separate work conversations from personal ones. The ramifications could be huge - and in my opinion, not worth it. Keep this one to yourself. You said it yourself - it was told to you "in confidence" and that is where it should remain.

Posted by: Kristie | October 21, 2008 at 01:42 PM

There is nothing to tell. Your friend told you something with a big "IF" in it. IF they get an offer they are PLANNING to resign. If "ifs" and "ands" were pots and pans the whole world would be a kitchen. PLANNING and doing are not the same thing and a job offer is not a job offer until it is offered. Quit worrying until you have something to tell.

Posted by: Darrel | October 21, 2008 at 02:16 PM

Employment Background Check Guidelines: Complying with the Fair Credit Reporting Act, conducting credit background checks and running a criminal check to avoid negligent-hiring lawsuits